Phone Syndrome

My kids have a serious affliction. It's the Phone Syndrome. No, really. Every time I get on the phone, loud noises erupt from their mouths. It's amazing.

I can be in the opposite end of the house, and as soon as I hit "send", they come screaming through, noise blazing. And they usually have a problem that refuses to go away with a simple, "Go to your room and be quiet, because I'm on the phone." It's a code red emergency, something I have to arbitrate with the wisdom of Solomon and the patience of Job.

In the van, why do I continue to call my husband? I know I'm going to get interrupted. "Get off my arm rest!" "My arm is tired!" "Mom, he won't get off my seat." "Well, you're on my side of the seat." "I am not".... and on it goes. But, the Eternal Optimist part of my brain never seems to learn.

It's on those days that I really wish I had one of those thingies limo drivers have. One push of the button, and it's peace and quiet....Ah......The wall goes up, the noise goes down, and I'd probably enjoy it so much I would forget all about making that call.